Observers Gotta Observe: Water Park Edition

Aaron is usually the only one privy to my slightly snarky water park observations, but I decided to share these with you!  I believe the word you are looking for is lucky.  ;)

1.  Rough Start
When I first go into a water park, it is so loud and overstimulating!  Once we were at one and it was "party night!" or something like that.  So, in addition to the sounds of splashing water, fans, and happy children, there was bumping dance music.  I felt like I was in my own personal, overstimulated hell.  But, then I got used to it and it was all good :)

2.  Cautionary Tale of Tattoos
I understand the appeal of tattoos.  I get that it's a way to mark important life events, share creativity, or tell a story/testimony.  I'm just saying it might be a good idea to go to a water park in case you are considering any of the following:

• a large oak tree in your cleavage with a skull sporting pig tails on the side
• barbed wire with a dangling dream catcher or two on your upper arm
• haunted house on the shoulder
• flaming infinity sign on your back
• rosary necklace around the neck

What looks good on a firm 18 year old body, might not look so great on the "40 year old and I've had a few too many beers body" or the "30 something had some babies body."  Just make sure you'll like it when you look different or will have the confidence not to care if your tattoo gets a bit wonky.  Also, go ahead and get those tats touched up; put it in the budget!

3.  Defined Water Park Personalities

Our daughters have very defined water park personalities!

• Leah is the "watch me!" kid.  She's always coming up with fun tricks, jumps, and handstands, and spins for us to watch.
• Maggie is the hot tub kid.  She gets cold really easily, so she likes to spend lots of time in the hot tub!  
• Gracie is the water slide kid.  She will go up and down a water slide literally 20 times in a row.  Those stairs are quite a workout!  

4.  I saw a guy who looked like Buddy Garrity on the lazy river.

It wasn't him.

5.  Cell phone usage

Almost every time we're at an indoor water park, I see someone talking on a cell phone.  I can barely hear myself think, so I'm always slightly impressed that they can hear someone on a phone.  I'm also impressed by the risk takers using their cell phones in the hot tub...whether or not it's in a ziplock bag.

6.  About the hot tub...
Let's keep it PG, playahs.  Moving on...

7.  Camo isn't just for the Army/hunting/Capture the Flag anymore
A couple years ago, the bridal store downtown had camo prom dresses in the display window.  Then, I actually saw a girl wearing one with a blaze orange sash/belt, naturally.  And it wasn't the army camo, it was the kind that has branches and leaves on it.  

Fast forward to the camo swimming suits I saw.  I felt that the military-esque camo swimming trunks were anticipated, but the mom wearing a branch and leaves camo tankini with coordinating skirt was a bit unexpected.  

8.  I like that lots of water parks have life jackets.
It puts my mind at ease when I can't spot the girls right away.

9.  Lifeguards rule
I was a lifeguard back in the day...way back in the day.  I'm here to tell you that lifeguarding is as boring as heck, except when you are pulling someone out of the water, and then you're adrenaline is going crazy!  I like watching the lifeguards scan the water and walk back and forth to the areas that would be blind spots if they weren't checking.  It seems like it helps keep the guards alert.  Lifeguards win!

10.  I like that the girls especially like water parks
I like that they play so nicely together.  I think it's especially sweet, too, that after they tire of the slides, they play imagination games with each other in the regular pool part!

Do you have any random water park observations?  Do share!

Also, are indoor water parks a midwest thing, or are they all over?

Happy Monday!

Frog Repellent

We have family movie night on Sunday evenings which is kind of reminiscent of when I was little and The Wonderful World of Disney was on TV at that same time.  Let me tell you, ABC really knew what they were doing when they put together that schedule!  Because, as the parent, I'm spent at the end of the weekend, and we can all use the downtime before the beginning of a new week!

I also psychotically check out the movies we watch, because we're kind of picky about what the girls watch.  I check Plugged In movie reviews before we rent them, to make sure that movies are appropriate for our sweet and sensitive girls.  

I was happy when I checked and saw that Muppets Most Wanted received a green light for people of all ages!

image source

The basis of the plot is that Kermit, the ultimate good guy...

image source

is abducted and replaced with Constantine, the really bad guy frog.

image source

And, from what I saw, Plugged In was right!  There was slapstick "violence," like the way that every building/phone booth Constantine left blew up.  It was obviously over the top and funny.

But, not to my little girls.

They insisted that it was too scary (I think it was maybe too suspenseful or uncomfortable for them), so we played computer games on the bed while Aaron and Leah finished watching the movie.

The only problem with them not finishing the movie was that they didn't get to see the resolution of the happy ending. 

They were pretty freaked out going to bed, but we managed to get them down without much of an incident and explained the happy ending. 

Until the next night.

Have mercy.

The girls were going to a Backyard Bible Club for the week, so they were up until later than 8:00 every night which is a big deal in their little worlds.

And, I don't care how old you are, being tired heightens your emotions...all the emotions.  In this case, their fears were highly, highly heightened.

Maggie was freaking.out...crying to the point of sheets of snot flowing down her face.  I didn't have tissues within reach, so I took one for the team, and used my shirt as a tissue.

You know you've done it before, too :)

I said all the good mom things.  We read a Bible verse about God being with us and not needing to be afraid.  We held hands and prayed.  We sang "My God is so BIG, so strong and so mighty..."   

All.the.things.

I even pulled out my successful hostage negotiator voice (soft, low, and soothing), which is normally a sure fire hit, but to no avail.

I mean, none of it worked.  None of it!

Aaron even tried rocketing Maggie up to her top bunk, which she normally loves, but she was wildly thrashing around so he couldn't.

Did I mention she was overtired?  Because, she was overtired.  

I was desperately trying to come up with something helpful.

As Aaron was singing our nighttime songs over their sobs, BING!  The idea light bulb lit over my head.

I ran out to the garage and grabbed a bottle of Buggins.

Obviously.

"Girls!" I exclaimed with great confidence and happiness.  "I have just the thing!  What do frogs eat?  Bugs, right?"

"Yeah," they managed to choke out between sobs.

"I grabbed some Buggins!  We can spray it in your room so that bugs won't come in.  If bugs aren't in here, frogs won't want to come in here either, because there won't be anything for them to eat.  I'll spray Buggins, and you won't need to worry about the bad Kermit any more!"

BOOM!

My bizarre-o "logic" worked!  I sprayed it around their room and on them, and they went right to sleep!  

Now, if I'm still spraying Buggins in their room at Christmastime, I'll be concerned.  But for now, I'll chalk this up as a mommy win :)

Have you had any happy mommy wins lately?

Oh, I suppose this qualifies as...

In case you missed the other one, here it is :)

Now, don't forget!  Tell me about your latest mommy win...

I Was Not at My Best

For starters, I only have 1 pictures of tornado/storm damage, because someone took my camera :(  We were in the play place at Walmart, I set my camera down, and forgot to bring it with me.  Aaron went back to check and asked at customer service, but it was nowhere to be found.  Sad day.

Anyway, this is our neighbor's tree that got blown down.  We didn't have much damage in our area as the 2 tornadoes were in other areas of town.  

From what I read, only 1 person was seriously injured (and she should recover well).  And while there was undoubtedly millions upon millions of dollars worth of damage done to the university, the most important thing is that no lives were lost.  

Through this, I've come to the conclusion that I do not do well in a moderate crisis.

A regular crisis?  I'm your girl.  There will be a plan of action.  There will be good questions asked.  I will be the queen comforter and helper.

But, I don't do the moderate crisis thing well at.all.

Of which crisis am I speaking, you may ask.

We didn't have power for like 36 hours.

That is certainly not a major crisis.  I mean, I have friends who work at the university who were handling major crises with grace and calm and strength.  My lack of electricity doesn't even come close in comparison to what they were dealing with.

I would even say that not having electricity for around 36 hours is on the low end of the moderate crisis.  

The storm that brought the tornado, came to town probably around 11:00ish pm last Monday night.  There was a lot of wind and rolling thunder and flashes of lightning.  The tornado siren didn't even go off...likely because elevation of the tornadoes was so low that the dopplar radar couldn't detect them.

We lost power around then.

Maggie woke up from the storm.  She was crying, because she didn't think she could fall asleep without the fan on.  To be fair, it got pretty stuffy pretty fast.  We didn't want her to wake up Gracie with her crying, so she and I took turns playing Dots, my favorite time wasting game on the tablet.  

After a while, we tried to get Maggie to go back to bed, but she was pretty worked up, so she and I camped out on the couches.  I was awake for longer than I slept, so needless to say, that's not the best way to start a day that contains a moderate-low crisis.  

Aaron very sweetly walked to the gas station to see if they had coffee.

While he was gone, I started getting frantic about not being able to take a shower.  I mean, technically I suppose I could have taken one in the dark, but at that moment, I wasn't sure what the water situation was. 

I'm not even one of those people who has to take a shower every day.  So, in an act of desperation, I grabbed some baby wipes and wiped out my armpits.

I apparently have no shame seeing as I shared that bit of information with the world wide web, but that gives you a glimpse as to how well I wasn't handling this!

Plus, I can't possibly be the only person who has ever done that...fess up :)

Anyway, Aaron came back without coffee, but he had run into some neighbors, so he returned with news of the tornadoes' damage.  

He also grabbed a travel mug so that our neighbor, Larry, could make me some instant coffee!  He must have lit their gas stove with a lighter or something.

Larry even told Aaron that he added an extra half scoop of coffee to make it stronger for me. 

So super nice!!!

Thankfully, my parents were already planning on visiting us for the day, and they were already on their way!

Aaron and I walked around our neighborhood, checking out the damage.  

It was getting hot.

I hate being hot.

I reeeeeeeally hate being hot.

I mean, let's just say that humidity and I don't really connect.

The girls were getting bored with walking around when a dog started trotting after Gracie.

She flipped out, so I carried her for the rest of the way home.  

My parents had gotten into town by the time we got home, so the girls and I met them in the Walmart parking lot, while Aaron went to work.  Between the road construction and storm damage, I wasn't sure they'd even be able to make it to our house.

We headed out of town to my favorite restaurant which lived up to the hype :)

We walked around the river and had such a fun time!  We got cupcakes and explored the fun downtown mill district.

I called Aaron and found that there was still no power, but we headed back home anyway.  

After enjoying a supper of sandwiches, my parents headed for home, and we headed to our friends' house.

The girls happily played outside with Jaime and Amy's kids, climbing up and sliding down the awesome inflatable water slide.  I took an actual shower...ahhhhhhhhhh!

As we started to pack the girls up to go home, I got a text from a friend saying that it was possible that we weren't going to have power for another day or 2.

At that moment, I was done.

As in:  drop the mic...Becky OUT!

I called the power company to see if there was a timeline for when our power was going to be back on.  I was nice, because, you know, it's not their fault there was a tornado.  He said, basically, in 12-24 hours.

There was no way we were going to be able to sleep, so we decided that the girls and I would head to my parents' house.  Aaron wanted to be home to make sure our basement didn't get water in it due to another storm that was on its way.  

I turned into the focused, intense mom.

I tried to give the girls a pep talk along the lines of, "We're each going to pack 3 outfits and work together to get going as soon as possible!"

I failed to mention that the reason we were hurrying was because the sooner we got going, the sooner we would get to Nana and Papa's house and the sooner they would be sleeping.

Let's just say that they perceived the Mommy-in-go-time-mode as MOMMY IS FREAKING OUT AND I SHOULD PANIC!

Did I mention that I was wearing a headlamp?  Because I was wearing a headlamp.

this is an old picture

Soooooooooo, they also probably felt like they were being interrogated every time I looked at them.  

I wouldn't say that this was a recipe for success and harmony and happiness.

It was more of a recipe for crying and panic and dismay and crying.  

Oh, and crying.  

Did I mention there was crying?

I can't say I blame them, because I wanted to cry, too, but I was too busy wearing a headlamp and shoving random clothes in a bag.

Aaron talked and prayed the girls off of the emotional edge, as I teetered dangerously close to the aforementioned edge.

But, we made it!  We left our house at 8:45 and got to my parents' house at a little after 11:00...the last 15 minutes were through pouring rain.

But, hey, at least it wasn't a tornado.

And at least I wasn't wearing a headlamp :)

Linking up with And Babies Don't Keep!

Local Mom Frantic About Water Being Shut Off (I'm making fun of myself with a The Onion-esque post)

MIDWESTERN SMALL TOWN--Upon returning home from a full day away, Becky, an area mom of three young daughters, was greeted by the foreboding sight of yet another neon notification paper.

"Not again!" she exclaimed.  Becky's water was being shut off for the second day in a row due to road construction.

"She was pretty worked up," her husband, Aaron, reported.  "Becky's not a high maintenance lady.  I guess she just really values being able to flush the toilet."

In response to our inquiry, Becky explained, "It wouldn't have been so bad if it wasn't for the second day in a row.  I mean, on day 1, I managed to be gone for much of the day.  My oldest daughter was safely away at school where she could freely drink water, wash her hands, and flush the toilet.  The little ones each had a dentist appointment and then we drove a half hour away so we could have Panera for lunch.  I had some Kohl's cash to spend, so the retail therapy helped put my mind at ease.  After that, I took the girls to visit our friend, Steph.  The plan was for the girls to nap there, but you know how that goes."  She sighed.  "Gracie was bugging Maggie like it was her job.  And if it was her job, she would have gotten a promotion due to excellent job performance."

"I mentioned to Becky that you can manually add water to your toilet tank to force a flush," Steph informed reporters.  "She was visibly relieved.  I guess I thought that was something that everyone knew."

When asked why she gets so frantic about potentially not being able to flush the toilet, Becky responded, "Do you have 3 young daughters?  You should see how much toilet paper they use!  I mean, I gently remind them to use 4 to 6 squares, but sometimes I think they just give the roll a spin and watch it fly off.  I genuinely don't know if it would be possible to flush all of that at the end of the day."

In response to being asked what her plan was for day 2, Becky shook her head, "I suppose I'll fill the bathtub with water so I can flush the toilet in case of emergency.  I need water for supper, so I'll set some out just in case it's not back on in time."

"You know, if I wanted to live like the Little House on the Prairie days I would go camping," Becky added.  "I mean, at least Ma and Laura could get water from a well or stream.  What if I spontaneously need to take a shower in the middle of the day?  I have no alternative water source besides, you know, the faucet.  I can't wash our clothes in the little bit of water that's in our Keurig."

"I usually wash clothes in the evening," Aaron answered after much prodding  "It is kind of funny that she's so worried about something that she doesn't do all that often."

A Glimpse into the Random Bits of My Quirky Life: Tums Edition

Edited June 11th:  Hi And Babies Don't Keep Friends!  When Kristi announced her link up, I immediately knew this was just the post to link up!  I'll have something "fresh" next time, but for now, please enjoy the ridiculousness that is my life :)  I'm looking forward to reading on commenting on YOUR stories, too!

There was a scene in Armageddon, the box office hit thriller starring Ben Affleck, when this crazy guy is sitting on a nuclear warhead and an astronaut looks at him and sternly says, "Get off.  The nuclear warhead.  Now."

On a side note, maybe Armageddon wasn't a box office hit thriller, but I believe that I still own it on VHS.

Additionally, Ben Affleck is part of my favorite celebrity couple.

STOP MAKING FUN OF ME!!!

I can't believe I even like that movie, because I pretty much hate space.

As in outer space.  I am a fan of personal space.  

Aaaaaaaaaanyway, I have moments like that astronaut...when I say things that are so utterly ridiculous that I can't even believe that those words just came out of my mouth.

I feel like, as parents, that happens more than we'd care to admit :)

So, in light of Armageddon, space, nuclear warheads, Ben and Jen (Jen and I are pregnancy buddies seeing as I was pregnant the same time as she was...twice.  STOP MAKING FUN OF ME!!!), and embracing the quirky, I will occasionally be giving you...

I'll say "you're welcome" already.  Really, there's no need to thank me.

Last Wednesday, Gracie had a hard time falling asleep.

The above picture is from a different night.

And yes, those are bitten peeps being pulled around on a xylophone.

Anyway, the girls got to bed around 8:15 which is late for them.  They are used to being in bed around 7:30, but our friends were over to watch Survivor.

And we ate puppy chow.

I love puppy chow.  For people.

The girls went to bed well which is always a huge bonus.

But, around 9:45 Gracie began making some rumblings which woke up Maggie, and Maggie called out on her behalf.

How generous.

You do need to understand that I value sleep.

I particularly value the sleep of my children.

Because it leads to more sleep for me.

We are all happier when we are all sleeping more.

It seemed like Gracie hadn't slept.  It was one of those things that I could just kind of tell, and that problem needed to be rectified immediately.

So, I crawled into the bottom bunk with her, brushed her hair away from her face over and over again (known as "softing" when I was growing up) while we whispered about our favorite things and told the other that they were beautiful, pretty, cute, and adorable.

I left her to sleep, but that only lasted like a minute until she was needing attention again, because she missed me so much.

Apparently I am that awesome.

This time, though, I pulled out the big guns.

FIGURATIVELY.

I had already given her one of the bracelets I wear (courtesy of Leah from the rainbow loom) so she could feel close to me.  I decided to bust out the washable red marker to draw hearts on our hands.

I took this picture the next morning :)

Look!  We're heart buddies now.  We can just look at our hands and feel close to each other.

Apparently, I think my life is a Hallmark movie.  Because, really, who does something so cheesy?

Additionally, if Gracie gets a heart tattoo on her hand when she's older, we'll all know why.

The heart buddy thing, although touching, wasn't exactly effective.

Next, Gracie and I cuddled on my bed.  We closed our eyes, and I asked her to imagine a night sky full of stars.

She asked if she could imagine Elmos instead.

I agreed. 

We whisper counted 20 Elmos.

Then 20 stars and 20 sheep and 20 cookies and 20 fill-in-the-blanks.

While cuddling with a usually very busy 3 year old is endearing and lovely, it was after 10 at this point and she didn't seem much closer to being ready for bed.

And then I said, "Gracie, would a Tums help you sleep?"

Whadaya know!  She thought a Tums would surely help her sleep!

I gave her half of a Tums, laid her back in bed, and she was out.

Tums...Mommy's favorite placebo :)

So, tell me!  What's the most ridiculous thing you've ever said out loud?

Linking up with:

My Firstborn Oldest

Yes, the title is redundant.  I did it for emphasis :)

One of the things I love about Leah are her contrasts.

She is ridiculously creative and imaginative and is equally committed to accuracy and rules and a literal take on all the things.

That whole accuracy thing?  She gets it from her firstborn accurate mom :)

For example, I've mentioned Leah's love for all things The Sound of Music.

She loves it with the precision and accuracy of a German Austrian engineer...all the way down to the hair style :)

Did you notice how she's standing with her hands behind her back?  Yep, that's how the Von Trapp children stand...in case you were wondering!

So, you can imagine my delight when she brought this paper home from school a few weeks ago.  It totally exemplifies the way she sees things through the lens of a firstborn child committed to literal accuracy!

Yep, she's comparing herself to the main character in the book.

My very favorite is the one on the bottom...

Yes...Heidi Heckelbuck is in a book.  

Leah?

Not in a book :)

Have a literally awesome day!

The Many Hats (and Faces) of Party City

We headed to Party City again on Saturday to get some supplies for Maggie's upcoming birthday!

Nothing much, just some plates and stuff.

The girls always want us to get a ridiculously large pinata, but I always say no.

It's important to be consistent.

I'm also not quite crazy enough to allow a 4 foot tall Dora pinata in my house!

Close, but not quite ;)

After we gathered our supplies (and I stuffed down my fear of lice), we let the girls try on some stuff!

What is not to love about the creepy Dora masks?  I feel like they're something a bank robber would wear...

The picture of Leah with the mustache is probably my favorite :)

There were sparkle hats of every color of the rainbow!

I really wanted them to try on the tiny sparkly cowboygirl hat, but they were disinterested.

They were more interested in weird Christmas hats and animal masks.

I can't say I blame them, though.  I mean, it's not every day you get to wear a Christmas tree on your head.

Not to mention, it's even decorated :)

Over by the Christmas paraphernalia, they had some, um, interesting things.

Like the ever popular shot glass necklaces...

And I'm pretty sure that Jesus wasn't born so we could have Santa Smoking Jackets.

And by "pretty sure," I actually mean utterly confident.

Creeeeeepyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.

Then there were these:

I mean, really.

I have no words.

:)

Have a happy day!

Kickin' it Old School: Thanksgiving Service

Ahhhh...

We just got back from our community Thanksgiving service, and it's pretty much one of my favorite things!

I grew up going to a fairly conservative Bible church until I was 12 years old.

I'm talking pews, organ, hymnals...PLUS the music leader waving his arms up in front to keep everyone together.

The Thanksgiving service brings me right back to all the good things (and none of the less than good things).

Some years there has been a men's quartet.  Other years, there's been open sharing.

There's always hymn singing!

The church we were at tonight even had the same hymnals as the ones I grew up with.

Apparently it's not just any old hymnal...it's THE hymnal.

Anyway, I got to teach Leah how to use a hymnal which was kind of funny...she's not a fan :)

We all sang together, and it sounded like a choir.

We read Scripture and prayed.

There was even the whole randomly-pray-a-sentence-out-loud part and people happily participated.  

We had a pie social at the end (I made this), too!

There's just something about coming in out of the cold, dark evening into a bright, warm church that makes me happy.  

Just like there's something about hymns, the KJV, men in suits, watching my husband and our friend be the edgy youth group guys during singing, and talking to Leah about how she wanted to pray a sentence about being thankful for Jesus dying on the cross that makes me feel like a carefree 9 year old again.

Maybe that's weird, but I'm OK with it :)

And even though I wouldn't want to live old school, I'm always really, really happy to visit!

Unsolicited Parenting Advice

Friends.

I don't like to give unsolicited parenting advice, because, really, nobody likes that.

But, this. 

This can probably be categorized under Parenting Tip, more than anything else.

Meet my buddy, the paper lunch bag.

We all have times where we need to throw away something that belongs to our child.  Very often, they don't even remember that they have these items/treasures, but if they see them, all of a sudden, the thing you just threw away becomes their favoritetoyeverrrrrrr!

And that's just drama.

I don't think I'm alone when I say, the less drama the better!

Take this skirt, for example.

It has a hole/ruffle that I don't know how to fix.  Leah has had this skirt since she was probably 5, so she's literally worn it to pieces.

Even though, seemingly over night she's gone to wanting to wear jeans all the time (they're warmer than a skirt with leggings), I know she would have feelings about seeing the skirt in the garbage.

So, I put it in a paper bag, toss it out, and she is none the wiser.

I went for the big ones tonight, though.

Toothbrushes.

The ladies like to hoard toothbrushes.

I'm okay with them having a primary toothbrush and a backup...which is probably a little weird.

But, I draw the line at FOUR (or 3, in Leah's case) toothbrushes per person.

After the girls went to bed tonight, I grabbed the 5 doomed toothbrushes.

The bristles have certainly seen better days.

Plus...

The toothbrushes go into their new home...

and then to their final home.

See!  The skirt AND toothbrushes are in there, but the girls have no idea!

I feel like I've won.

Maybe.

They're still sleeping and haven't brushed their teeth since I tossed the toothbrushes a couple of hours ago, so we'll see.

Oh, and 2 more things!

You should read this great blog post (from a couple of years ago) called Parenting 001.  It's one of Aaron's and my favorites!

Last but certainly not least, be sure to check back tomorrow to see some of the awesome family pictures that our friend, Brandon, took.

Here's a sneak peek!

Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!  I'm so excited!  They turned out awesome!

Have a great day...and throw something away :)

Pintertest Kitchen: At Least it was Easy...

OK.

One of my favorite blog link ups is Pintertest Kitchen with Jessica at Keeping up with the Johnsons.

I like it because it motivates me to try recipes that I've pinned and never actually made.  

So, last week I tried this honey garlic crockpot chicken that was sure to be awesome!  I mean, it had honey and garlic (duh) AND hoisin and blackberry jam (you know, to add to the depth of flavor).  Plus, it used chicken breasts on the bone so the chicken wouldn't dry out.

If that doesn't sound like a winner, what does?

womp, womp.

Not a winner.  

Not even close.

More like a loser.

But, the blackberry jam is really good on a triscuit with goat cheese.

I digress.

Last Friday I got my wisdom teeth removed, like all cool 35 year olds do.

So, my food consumption has mostly been limited to smooth, drinkable things.  I did have pasta once, because I was feeling edgy.  I'm getting in touch with my inner rule follower here, because the very last thing in the world I want are dry sockets. 

Anyway, after the honey garlic chicken bombed, I thought to myself, "Self, how about a nice easy soup?  That's just the thing for your weary mouth."

Enter, Easiest Ever Pumpkin Soup from our friends at Good Housekeeping.

And easy it was!

I only needed a few ingredients:

On a side note, remember how there was a pumpkin blight a couple of years ago?  I'm only now relaxing my pumpkin hoarding reflexes.  Because, apparently I needed to have a minimum of 8 cans of pumpkin on hand at any given moment in order to properly function.

Moving on...

I grated the onion, tossed it in a pot that had 2 tablespoons of olive oil all heated in the bottom.  I cooked the onion for a couple of minutes and added the pumpkin, chicken broth, 1/2 cup of cream, 3/4 teaspoon of salt, and 1 teaspoon of pumpkin pie spice.  I heated it to a simmer which took about 3 minutes and let it simmer for like 2 minutes.  

All per the recipe.

Then I dished it up, sprinkled a bit of cumin, some smoked paprika, and freshly ground black pepper on top.  I thought the smokiness and hint of spice would be good.

Then I took this picture.

Mmmmmm...steamy, rich, delicious soup.

Except, not really.

I tried it.

It was blah.  

Even though I've never eaten mud, in my imagination it was kind of muddy tasting.

I thought maybe adding some acid would help.  

So, I stirred in a squeeze of lime, which brightened it up a bit (mud on a bright, sunny day perhaps?).

I added some water so it wouldn't be so darn gloppy (mud in the rain, maybe?).

I sprinkled on a bit more salt, because salt makes everything better (mud on the sea shore?).

It was certainly edible.

I ate it for supper while everyone else ate pizza bites (always a winner).  

And then I tore one pizza bite into little pieces and ate it tiny bit by delicious bit.

Oh well, the recipe claimed to be the easiest ever, not the most delicious ever.  It really was beyond easy!  

And fast.  Fast is good!

The moral of the story?  Don't make pumpkin soup.  Make pizza bites instead!

Disclaimer:  Please know this "review" was meant to be lighthearted :)  I would never give a less than positive recipe review to a recipe from normal person's blog...I just wouldn't say anything.  I feel like Good Housekeeping is corporate, and it doesn't really matter to them what little ol' me thinks!